OVER & OUT: Nicole Wolkov abandons cynicism for total sincerity

In each installment of the four-part OVER & OUT series, graduated Octagon staffers will be saying their adieus to Octagon readers before they head to their respective colleges. Former page editor Nicole Wolkov is the last in the series. 

Since I’m not an editor-in-chief, I don’t get the privilege of my farewell being published in the print edition (about which I’m not at all bitter). Instead of writing a farewell, I’ve decided to answer all the questions that go along with goodbyes.

Graduated senior Nicole Wolkov

Q: How long have you been at SCDS?

A: 13 years – and that’s long enough.

Q: How long have you been on Octagon?

A: Two years. I could have made editor-in-chief had I joined in freshman year … I really missed out.

Q: What have you most enjoyed about Octagon?

A: Definitely designing pages. Ask anyone on staff and they’ll tell you how much I love designing pages, and how great I am at it.

Q: What have you least enjoyed about Octagon?

A: Well, the adviser is quite incompetent. It’s not like I’ve seen the most rapid improvement in my writing since I began writing for the newspaper. Similarly, the other students on staff are extremely dull. I definitely haven’t met underclassmen with whom I can have fascinating conversations about linguistics and history, among other topics.

Q: Why don’t you smile?

A: I smile! Unfortunately, I’ve been afflicted with “resting bitch face” for a long time. I don’t consider it a “bitch face,” but rather, a neutral, unsmiling, unamused expression. It’s just my relaxed facial position, I promise.

Q: Why do you always wear black?

A: Obviously, it’s to display the sadness that resides in the cavernous depths of my heart. For more, read the “My Angle.”

Q: Why do you always wear boots?

A: How else am I supposed to look taller? I’m like a hobbit in a land of elves.

Q: Why do you always paint your nails red?

A: When I feel extra rebellious, I’ll rush to my bathroom and pull out my one item of color: a bottle of red nail polish. I’ll proceed to paint my nails as quickly as possible, before my superego can overpower my id, which forces me to drop the nail polish.

Q: Do you have a favorite Octagon memory?

A: All the times when I have had to wait for the underclassmen to stop chattering, close their laptops and listen to the editors or Fels talk.

I also loved listening to sophomores Chardonnay Needler and Jack Christian bicker. If I could sit through that without jamming sharpened pencils in my ears, I’m ready for anything.

Q: Do you have a favorite SCDS memory?
A: Kindergarten and first grade were nice when I didn’t have to worry about tests, homework, extracurriculars, community service or college. Ah, yes, the privileges of youth.

Q: What will you miss most about SCDS?

A: Definitely the administration. They’ve always listened to my opinions, helped me in and outside of the classroom, served as excellent role models, provided an environment perfect for personal growth and encouraged my passion for learning. Oh, wait, I’m thinking of the teachers.

Q: What will you miss most about Octagon?
A: Former online editor-in-chief Zoë Bowlus and current online editor-in-chief Sonja Hansen saying “So how about that next blog?” And who could forget Fels’s classic line: “Nicole, do you even write a blog anymore?”

By Nicole Wolkov

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