In the “Pie in the Sky” series, three staffers tried pies at three local restaurants. Next freshman Emma Boersma will review Ettore’s European Bakery and Cafe.
After eating five tacos at the Rockvemberfest taco buffet, one wouldn’t expect to be craving pie. But I was.
According to junior Nico Burns and former Country Day student Molly Gherini, Freeport Bakery (2966 Freeport Blvd.) is the place to go when you’re having such cravings. I decided to bring them and junior Smita Sikaria along to decide if Freeport was really that place.
Freeport’s rustic, hippy, floral wallpaper, funky mish-mash of clutter and knick-knacks by the microwave, and stiff, wooden chairs make it feel as though you’re eating at your grandma’s house at Thanksgiving. I half expected some old lady to tell me to wipe my mouth and clear my plate when I was finished.
Pies and cakes are displayed on one side of the bakery’s counter, and pastries are shown on the other.
“I’m waiting!” the woman taking my order jokingly said while I surveyed my options.
Jeez! Sorry, lady, but for me, picking your pie – or really any dessert – is like picking a name for your firstborn child: stressful and regrettable if your selection is wrong. So I like to take my time.
I decided on the cherry hand pie ($6.95), the three-berry hand pie ($6.95) and a slice of the deep-dish apple pie ($3.95
per slice and $16.95 for a 9-inch pie).
Unfortunately, while they looked delicious, the Pear Fladen (pears, cream, almond paste, Marsala and currants), the pumpkin cheesecake (with a Linzer-cookie crust base and pecan praline sides), the Acorn cake (a marbled buttermilk and chocolate, acorn-shaped cake with chocolate mousse filling and chocolate ganache frosting) and several other cakes are unavailable for purchase by the slice.
Because my primary sources of income are begging my parents for money and occasionally scooping change out of public fountains, I decided against purchasing an entire cake ($17.95-$39.95). But I would recommend buying any one of these if you’re hoping to impress your friends and family at holiday dinner parties. Just order by Nov. 20.
While the clerk rang us up, she suggested we use the microwave in the corner to heat up our slice of apple pie.
Question: How many Country Day students does it take to work a microwave?
Answer: More than four.
With all of our heads put together, we could not figure out how to operate Freeport’s industrial-sized microwave. So much for that private-school education. Our own stubbornness also prevented us from asking for help. Finally, a woman showed us how to slam the microwave door closed to get it to run.
Even though we embarrassingly struggled with the microwave, I’d highly recommend heating up one’s pie. Warm chunks of apple are so much more appetizing than cold ones.
Our slice of deep-dish apple pie lasted about two minutes. My ravenous friends are fast eaters, but, luckily, I’ve also
been trained to devour food because my little sisters love to scarf down our shared desserts.
Freeport has perfected the classic American dessert. This was my first time encountering deep-dish apple pie, and I can safely say I’m never going back to regular pie. The huge crust and the boulder-sized apple chunks are totally fulfilling.
The hand pies, which resemble calzones, are tart. Their sharp zing was a little overpowering, but I could see it being much more bearable if accompanied by some vanilla bean ice cream. After a few sour nibbles, my friends said that they would leave the rest of the hand pies for me to finish. What pansies!
“But, Sonja, I’m looking for something a little less traditional! I want a treat that breaks gender stereotypes!”
Well, Freeport has that too. Since August 2015, Freeport has made controversial Ken Doll Cakes ($50-$150). Instead of the usual Barbie doll in the middle of a cake that is made to look like her dress, Freeport gives customers the option of Ken in the dress instead.
And Freeport now offers a harvest-themed Ken dress that resembles a cornucopia.
—By Sonja Hansen